RednecksMeetAndDrink.com

Random Picture Time!











So, we get it, Old Man Winter…you’ve huffed and puffed and blown us all in, literally. There’s approximately a foot of snow encasing our home on all sides, which is sure to make us homebound (auto correct on my phone made us “homegirls”). Its too cold to enjoy!! I spent 30 minutes getting the girls ready, layer after layer and searching for the right clothes because you know there will be pictures taken. Addie was ready first, so she went out first. Lillian and I took another 15 minutes to get ready, and when we went out to play Addie was already done, pouting by the door, having decided not to share her pretty smile. Lillian took her glove off while I was arguing with Addie to smile for a picture, shoved her hand into the snow, and when the iciness started attacking her fingers taking no mercy on this new, naïve butterball of warmth, she shrieked. Both kids now crying and begging to go inside, I drag them back in. Will they remember all that I have done for them on this day when I am old and decrepit? No. They will remember and tell stories about the time I lost it and sent the milk cup flying because I was being treated like a maid (“Mom, you have a whole mess of things going on in the kitchen, are pressed for time, and a crying baby, but you STILL haven’t put milk in my empty cup. I told you three times!”). This is surely one of those momentss when taking a deep breath and remembering that God made these times to appreciate the exceptionally good days, is necessary.

Or just slam things around, and rip pizza rounds open to make for dinner…

A couple of nights ago I awoke in the chilly wee hours to find something crawling around in my bed, beginning to find me under the covers. A woodpecker! How did it find its way into my tightly secured-to-keep-the-cold-out house? My dreams! Two woodpeckers to be exact. Doug and I were at Creekmore Park, having a picnic and I spotted a woodpecker in the trees, and suddenly one under my blanket coming up like it was a groundhog. Doug didn’t notice my freaking out because he was yelling and becoming angry at my brother, who was far away teasing him by pretending he was gay, holding hands with a random dude. (What this would mean if I were to decode my dreams, I have absolutely no idea and I’m sure I don’t really want to know.)
What really happened? The woodpecker from my dreams under the covers was actually Addie, having awoken from a bad dream about a woodpecker! The woodpecker!! He’s everywhere, haunting us Erbs. I am afraid to show Lillian the pages with birds in her books, for this very reason now. Having a 4 year old in your bed is interesting. I am laying there, awake, for oh say another hour and a half afterwards. She’s tossing, turning, breathing out of her good nose hole. I have this awful taste in my mouth, I think it might be…yes, it is definitely cheez-its. When did I eat Cheez-its? GASP, Kestan!!!! She drank the rest of my bottle of Little Black Dress (which is very good by the way, in moderation) and ate cheez-its, having decided to go to bed without brushing her teeth, indubitably inducing deep sleep where my crazy dreams can find me. We are not on speaking terms.

I saw this commercial for BlackPeopleMeet.com. Segregation at its finest? Feeling like you can’t be a part of something only makes you want to lash back bigger and harder. I will start a RednecksDrinkAndMeet.com. It will mostly take place in the back end of someone’s woods around a bonfire. This person may or may not know their property is being used for such dating experiences. We do not discriminate against missing teeth, fingers, or overall knowledge of the use of the word “kilt” (some will argue this is from a movie they once saw where a funny looking ginger-like man wore a special skirt and nobody kicked their ass, and some will argue it means they “kilt” a turkey last hunting season, but not in time for Thanksgiving dinner). Men to women ratio will likely be 5:2, though most women will be sloshed twice as fast as the men, because the cooler will start leaking and in an effort to save the beer they will be drank shotgun while the ingenuity to rig it with duct tape is still being sought out.“I’m Pretty Good at Drinking Beer” will be played on repeat. It will be good times. ONLY if you are redneck, which is of course, a special breed of American. End story.

I can’t hear very well. Since being sick, I’ve had this pressure in my head that really just disrupts my hearing just a little. Loud noises, like putting away dishes, the clanking noise really pierces my ear and feels amplified because of my invisible layer…much like what I believe it would sound like inside a drum. I’m trying not to complain too much about this, because really it’s a big relief to just deal with this! Without the pressure and headache, and needle poking behind your eye feeling. The only downside, is I’m unsure how loud my mumbles are. A mumble is a mumble for a reason, my dear :D I could be plainly stating what I thought I was sassily saying to myself.” I was putting you in your place in my head, but you could hear me, and I didn’t mean for that to…” Mechhh. Cabin Fever, it’s a real thing!!!!

Because we can’t just run out to the store right now, I’ve had to make do with the stuff we have here. No big deal! I found a great homemade macaroni recipe, and it turned out great. Its no Paula Deen, which my SIL makes on special occasion dinners, but its pretty good:
Mac’N’Cheese
8 oz uncooked elbow macaroni
2 cups shredded sharp cheddar cheese
½ cup grated parmesean cheese
3 cups milk
¼ cup butter
2 ½ tablespoons all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons butter
½ cup bread crumbs
1 pinch paprika

Cook macaroni according to the package directions. Drain. In a saucepan, melt butter over medium heat. Stir in enough flour to make a roux. Add milk to roux slowly, stirring constantly. Stir in cheeses, and cook over low heat untl cheese is melted and the sauce is a little thick. Put macaroni in large casserole dish, and pour sauce over macaroni. Stir well. Melt butter in a skillet over medium heat. Add breadcrumbs and brown. Spread over the macaroni and cheese to cover. Sprinkle with a little paprika. Bake at 350 degrees for 30 min. Serve. (I didn’t have the time, the butter, or the breadcrumbs to spare so I just made the macaroni and sauce, stirred that together well and served. Good stuff.)

I made it with Rachel Ray’s chicken tenders “everything” recipe, and peaches. Easy and great dinner, everyone ate quite well :)


This is "Daddy", hanging out on Lillian's crib...is this not as randomly funny as I think? I mean, if it was just there, and you didn't do it yourself and therefore didn't know...



The dog won’t go into the snow to do her business. So she pees on the steps and walks through it. Awesome!!
Keslyn

Fun sucker. Jerk.

Everyone has something that keeps them going, something that frees them from the stresses of weekly life. I say weekly, because in my life, I don’t always have daily stresses. I quite enjoy the balance in my life, and I can honestly say I will look back later in life and say I am glad I had these years at home with the girls. Daily frustrations, that’s a better way to explain it.

My frustrations are released through sarcasm, witty but cutting banter. This, I have control of. I let Kestan fully take over. Kestan comes to life when I am sick, stressed, tired, hungry, migraine-y, down, angry, and sad. She makes mean jokes, snaps quickly, has a quick temper, irritable, and just in general needs to be avoided. After a particularly long day or evening, you can find her sipping on a bottle of red wine, soaking in much pleasure while watching misery shows. Misery shows, are shows created to make you feel better watching someone else’s stupidity or desperation. Wipeout, for example, watching desperate people bound and leap for a chance at 10k. Idiots. Kestan laughs heartily when they look stupid, having no control over the situations. This is not a case of double personality, more or less a FULL personality. Kestan has been visiting (intruding) today. Without calling, or even knocking. She just bulldozed right in, bringing her loud, obnoxious self and sprawling herself out all over my couch, even having the nerve to ask me for cookies. She’s annoyed because she drank too much coffee, and now has the jitters. She’s annoyed because she doesn’t want to clean the house, because its always a mess just a few minutes after she’s cleaned it. I try telling her she will feel better if the house is clean, that clutter is in fact stressful on 80% of people. She tells me I am making that up. Liar. We argue for a while, I tell her she’s sucking the life out of me today. Fun sucker. Jerk. And NO, I DIDN’T MAKE THE DAMN COOKIES FOR YOU!!!! That’s right, I went there, came back, and slapped yo momma with that one.

I will send your mom an apology letter later…please send my reguards.

This semester is looking rough for Doug, for the three days he was off he did nothing but homework. Literally. From the moment after breakfast, until dinner, then after dinner til bed time. I hate that. He is seriously considering finding a part time, or less demanding job with more regular hours. This is a hard decision, and we are praying about it. We appreciate the security we currently have, but he’s running himself dog tired and spreading too thin. A job at the school would be awesome and ideal! Unfortunately, its extremely difficult making that happen. And of course, this is all hypothetical. This is my opinion. Wal-Mart has shown us nothing of the kind and family oriented workplace they have promoted of themselves. Empty promises. One would have to push to make things happen, and even then you wouldn’t get very far by yourself. Ask yourself, do you know ANYONE who is actually happy with the way things work at Wal-Mart? No.

Lillian is a funny baby. She laughs at everything, so easy. We currently have a hitting problem, when she’s frustrated or told no. Its not really even hitting, because its so light, but she does it in a way to make herself clear about what she means by it. This is a hard habit for me to break. I’ve tried several different ways of handling this, including ignoring it. This makes her hit harder and faster, with yelling. I’ve hit her back, softly in her belly to show her how it feels. This makes her cry and I feel bad. I’ve been told to try squeezing her hand lightly, its not supposed to feel good. I’ve done this most often, but she laughs!! She looks at me, opens her mouth as if to cry, and laughs!! Ahahaha…then she gives me the grinning “I’m so naughty but its funny” face and I have to turn away so I can laugh. This does NOT help my situation!! I love her too much. I know I’m turning her into a stinker. I will fix this, eventually.

This is one of the cutest pictures, they’re both sick, watching a Baby Einstein. Why does sitting in something special make them feel better? I have no idea!!




We watched Alpha and Omega last pizza/movie night. I really don’t recommend it, its not that great and has adult innuendo that was not only inappropriate, but not funny either. Don’t waste your time on that one! I can’t wait til we can get our hands on Tangled!!

I suppose I should end this and run out to the store to prepare for the ice storm that’s coming. Stuff like this always seems to happen when Doug has to work. Ugh. Don’t forget to make snow ice cream!! :D

-Kesolyn

p.s. I've realized how truly blessed I am recently. My silly personality probably overshadows that, but I know we are only here because God has allowed us to come this far. I am thankful that I can be who I am, and still serve an amazing God! I have grown spiritually a great deal this past year, and I appreciate everyone's support in this process. I love you all!!

"A dark side where all my inappropriate jokes dwell."

There are a few things in my life that bring me joy throughout my day.

We have recently acquired the funniest little dog from a friend who is overworked and over-schooled. She thinks she is attention starved, and always feels the need to touch me, to lay on me if I am still. Very much so a lap dog. I do not mind this. At any given time, and although there are many spots to claim, there are four of us occupying one space on the couch. I, naturally, am to act as the base. Sitting beside me, is Addie. Lillian is standing at my feet leaning against me. Meelo, the dog, is fighting for lap space with Addie. She believes she is a third child. I don’t believe she has ever known herself to be a dog, but simply another person with some sort of super-natural ability to grow thick body hair and a heightened sense of smell to detect what we have eaten by our burps. She has an underbite, which is quite comical on occasion…such as when she’s mad, sulking or just plain furious, she cocks her head over her shoulder (back naturally on you) to look you square in the eyes, underbite screaming “B*tch, pleeeease.”. She’s got jokes. Because of these moments, I always pounce on the ability to laugh hysterically when she misjudges distance, and falls off the couch. Or, say when she walks through the yard, stepping lightly and sometimes scurrying away from possibly having just stepped on one of her bombs. In my head, she’s saying “Damnit! It got on me! Why don’t you clean this place up!” Muahahaha, I laugh, evilly standing there watching her. THAT’S why. I like to presume everyone has a certain feel for how their dogs would be if they could talk. This, is mine.

I finished The Art of Racing in the Rain by Mark Stein, this is probably the source of my point above. This book is every bit as awesome as the reviews say. You may think its silly at first, being written from the family dog’s view points, but it is in fact a good read. He has a dark sense of humor that totally appeals to me, as I have a dark side where all my inappropriate jokes dwell. I can’t say too much without giving away important parts, but I definitely recommend it!

Its amazing how children can change and adapt to their surroundings, flourishing in less than fairytale homes. I truly believe God made children easily adaptable and quick to heal just for such cases. Its funny how dreams change, but still come true all the time. People overlook these small miracles throughout their lives. New dreams emerge practically overnight, keeping pace with our daily life, which ALWAYS evolves. We once dreamed of owning a home. Achieved. We dreamed of going back to school, half achieved. We dream of whisking away for the weekend to some magical island any time we pleased and having the freedom to do so with no responsibilities. Achie…well, still working on that one. When I first became a mom, my dream was for my child to survive me learning how to become a parent. Since nobody has died from my experimental meals, or extreme mood swings once a month, I think that deserves a check. Big thanks to Big Mack Daddy above who surely has made this possible. He really did right by us, creating us in a way that makes us adore our children, becoming fiercely protective of their safety, even from ourselves. Suppose that’s why we become so irrational and uptight after having a baby? I like to think that the parents who don’t care and do more harm to their children than good are more closely related to RATS. Rats (in a Norway study) will actually eat their young. Disgusting vermon who possibly don’t deserve to multiply. You all know someone who is like this. You (like me) might possibly even be related to these, rats.

Recently, I called in to pay an outrageous electric bill. After I gave her my information and begrudgingly paid it, I asked if there was some sort of spike or new fee for everyone last month. She tells me it was an estimated bill!! What the hell! She tells me “It appears, and I’m not sure why, but your meter was never read so it was estimated to be that much.” Great. I have a lazy bastard meter reader assigned to my route. And because I didn’t bother to open with that question, I had already paid and couldn’t get that back. Thanks a lot. Goodbye extra $80.

I am also in an ongoing (but healthy) argument on whether or not pancakes in an aerosol can are awesome or not…

I think I’m going to start a bucket list! I’ve already checked one off recently, it took me way out of my comfort zone. I love control. I am a control freak. My name is Keslyn…blah blah blah. But I did it!

Go for your dreams, shoot for the stars!! (and whatever else the pitiful self help books shove down deep in your mind)

-Kesolyn

"Got Jesus on my necklaces-ezz-ezz…"

I feel like on more than one occasion recently, there’s been a LOT of broadcasts on relationship problems. I am no relationship expert. We could talk more, make more time to communicate. Have you heard the terms, “Make love”? I saw a movie recently that explained it quite well. “Making love” doesn’t just refer to the physical aspect, but as in “Make love work”. As in TRY, fail and stumble, but TRY. I can understand if you fell in love, and that person turned out to be a crazed psychopath who sucked the life out of you, bared bloody fangs and then you decided to end it. What I mean though, is people making a commitment, then bailing when the times get hard. I won’t lie, I do tend to follow the “fight or flight” rules when under stress, visa vie smaller problems. This TRYing thing seems to have ended after my generation. Falling in love, tearing each other apart, attempting poorly to nurse the mangled remains. Moving on. Within a matter of weeks. Being suddenly in love, again!! “This is perfect, it will last, I’ve found my other half!!” REPEAT. Idiots. Life could certainly hurt a lot less. We eventually become numb to it, just another day, another rumor. So, to my younger generations, please stop this lunacy. You’re screwing up the world my kids will eventually live in!!

Molars!! We are working on cutting molars! This is the least amount of fun for her…I feel so bad, but I just can’t help but squeeze her and accept her loving sobs all over my shirt. I rocked her for 20 minutes! Well, she’s always been a lovey baby, and I can do this any time, but its that special feeling when the only person that can make it feel better is YOU. I just love her!! Still major slinkage when she doesn’t want to be made to walk…hilarious crumpling to the ground and absolute refusal. “No.” Hahah…She’s such a diva.

My aunt pointed out that my kids sleep nearly 12 hours at night, plus a two-three hour nap. I now understand just how lucky I am!! I can’t help but wonder why I would ever want to add a third to the mix and mess that up?!?

I was singing Taylor Swift’s (of ALL people, of ALL songs in the world) December, its one of those that just sticks in my head.

Addie is eating lunch, she asks me “Mom, can you sing (insert sudden dark/low voice noise) Got Jesus on my necklaces-ezz-ezz…”

Ahahahahaha…I laughed and laughed!! There’s only so much children’s singing and country and KLRC a mom can take, and this is one of my favorite up-beat songs. I am shamefully a fan of Ke$ha. She’s in the same category as Miley Ray Cyrus. I like her too, I’m a closet MRC lover. Party in the USA really did that one in for me…Doug thinks he’s married a 15 year old. I am young at heart, let me be young at heart and dumb!!! I’m well rounded, I like everything!!

Addie is doing great at everything, she loves to learn. We breezed through X, Y, Z flashcards reading each word fairly easily. This kid even uses the potty, wipes herself, then puts herself to bed for a nap. This makes me wonder what I really am doing with my free time since both my kids are independent and very capable…I need a hobby. Suggestions? (This obviously has to be something I can learn myself, and at home during breaks!)

Inception. Amazing movie. Amazingly confusing if you’re not paying attention. LeoDi in that one. Buried, Ryan Reynolds…I’m not sure I would watch it ever again. He was nominated for his role? Shocking, this was filmed with just him, in a box, buried alive. Obviously, given the title. Due Date, Zach Galafianakis, Robert Downey Jr. I think if you’re a teenager, or a drunk man, this would be funnier. I’m just NOT a fan of RDJ cursing and using the F word so much. He’s such a classy guy!! I like dumb movies, in fact I will watch Anchorman, Mean Girls, or Hangover if its on any channel, but this was a low level of comedy I even found distasteful. (“My father, the inventor of toaster strudel, wouldn’t be too pleased to hear about this.” haha)

The Amazing Loaf
1 pkg McCormick’s meatloaf seasoning
1 lb. ground beef
1 TBSP olive oil
1 small Vidalia or yellow onion, chopped
1 celery stalk, sliced
2 carrots, chopped
2 small potatoes, chopped
1 egg
Handful of bread crumbs
1 teaspoon celery salt
Pepper (to taste)
1 pkg McCormick’s brown gravy mix

Heat oven to 400 degree. Give the frying pan a good glug of olive oil, then over medium-high heat cook the onions, celery, carrots, and potatoes until soft, about 10-15 minutes, salt and pepper slightly. Remove from heat and cool. In a large bowl, mix ground beef, meatloaf seasoning, celery salt, pepper, egg, bread crumbs, and cooled pan ingredients until fairly blended. Shape into two loaves, in a 9x13 pan and bake for approx 35 minutes, checking for doneness. While meatloaf is baking, make brown gravy mix according to package. Serve with buttered peas, and rolls!! YUM…great alternative to ordinary meatloaf.

I will hopefully be attempting to try making homemade dish detergent, HERE. MoneySavingMom.com is a great website I encourage penny pinchers to check out, she teaches you a lot of things and there's tons of helpful advice as well as fun stuff!! I also read putting distilled vinegar in the jet dry spot will help with dish cloudiness? My SIL puts bleach in the bottom to be sure they’re extra clean. My MIL boils dish detergent on the stove to clean hard to remove black burn remains. I guess I married into a family of intelligence here!! They know everything!! I will also try my first deal scenario using coupons and in-store coupons coupled with sales this week. I’m really not sure I’m coupon using and deal swindling material, not to this extreme but it should be interesting 

Happy Monday!
Kesolyn

P.S. I am addicted to Angry Birds, the game on iPhone/iPad (or the “I” own you technology). I have wasted SO much time bombarding those pigs, and they just keep laughing at me!!!

“SNIIIIIIIIIPPP.”

I have to start this blog off with a funny story:

Doug has his hair cut, maybe once a month. I think this is more of a rebellious “I can grow my hair out if I want” phase leftover from army life. (This includes facial hair, full beard and moustache) When he has it cut, he also has them trim his beard and moustache for him. He generally comes home looking very suave and attractive, and most of the time I can’t leave him alone for a few days afterwards 
I was up close to his face before he was leaving for work (because he’s just so good looking when its neatly trimmed!) and noticed one stray hair sticking 4 cm past his other hairs. I poke fun, he tells me to fix it. Very hastily, I grab the best scissors we have that we normally use for trimming hair, and snip it off.

Here’s the sound: “SNIIIIIIIIIPPP.”

The number of i’s represent how many I actually cut off.
Not my best work. His eyes buldge, widening and narrowing at the same time, mostly in my direction. I think my heart was still beating, it was in my throat but it was beating. Fast.
“No no no, its fine babe. Really.” I can’t help but laugh as he goes to the mirror. Facial hair is definitely ONE thing proud men like to have nicely grown, perhaps sometimes burly looking depending on the taste. Awesome!! It was a little patch. R.I.P. Little Patch.

Its been a very interesting winter break (I’m now and as always on Doug’s schedule time wise. I am now referring to blog dates as reference in school schedules!). Our heat was off, many many times. We had men come out at least 6 different times, two different companies. This is extremely irritating, as well as heavy on the pockets. Wires, control boards, cleaning, tidying up, replacing, cleaning, cleaning, cleaning has taken place. We might have the world’s cleanest and best running system that has been checked and re-checked, and is in full working order. (for now, until it breaks down again. I no longer have faith in the piece of junk)

I can honestly and safely recommend Steve Reeves of Reeves Heating and Cooling in Rogers, AR. Great guy, efficient, not a talker. Gets the job done, with the right tools, that he ACTUALLY KNOWS HOW TO USE.

We had date night!! Grandma and Auntie gave Addie two fun filled nights away, she thought it was the best thing to ever happen to her. I scored on a wonderful babysitter for Lil one night, and we were off. Dinner at Texas Land and Cattle (two dollar margaritas, Thursday night. I do NOT recommend the bacon wrapped sirloin unless you can make sure they will cook it exactly as you ask. BUT, the beef soup is amazing. Potato undercooked.) We saw True Grit, great for a western! I didn’t fully understand the hype, because the story line just sort of ends matter of factly. I even bought the third book in a series I was reading (The Uglies, Scott Westerfeld. Fourth book I’ve been told has pros and cons. I am choosing not to read it, I don’t think it has too much to do with the first three, as it has different characters. I WILL say, however, that it IS a little younger than my taste. It’s YA section too, but so is Hunger Games and they were way more intense. Read if you like, they’re interesting enough to read in your quiet time.)

I believe I will be starting The City of Embers series soon. Cooking up times to meet a friend and swap STUFF. Yay!

I was sick as a dog the next day, stomach bug that everyone has gotten by now. Grr. This one came with flu-like pain in my back and legs? Woorrrd, awful.

I’ve also done an organic meal swap with my mommy’s group…cooking for 5-6 families this time! Two meals each. I made Greek Beef and Orzo (Originally Greek Lamb and Orzo, but I have conniptions about buying lamb, haha. Amazing with cheese! Easy too, in fact I might post recipe below!) and Chicken/rice soup.

Greek Beef and Orzo (in less than 30 min)1 lb. ground beef
2 cans (14.5 oz each) diced tomatoes
1 cup orzo (orzo is found in rice section)
Salt/pepper, to taste
1 tbs Parsley
1 cup cheese (to taste)

Brown beef in large sauce pan using salt/pepper, drain fat. Add both cans diced tomatoes, and parsley (I added this to recipe, parsley is good and delicious for it!) Bring to boil, turn down LOW and add orzo. Cover and simmer 10-15 min, stirring occasionally until orzo soaks liquid and softens. Sprinkle cheese, serve!! (Thanks Betty Crocker Pasta!!)

My favorite finds recently:
The Falsies, Maybelline mascara. I use waterproof. Be sure to scrape off excess from brush to tube’s side!!
3D Vivid White toothpaste.
TreSemme naturals volume conditioner.

Christmas was great! I undercooked potatoes, danced horribly to Michael Jackson’s Dance game on Wii, and fully recovered from my chemical burn (that I thought was poison ivy in my last post? UHM, so yeah…wouldn’t recommend Olay’s sensitive skin moisturizer!!). I just kept rubbing that stuff in every time it got painful and my drying agent (for poison ivy, no less) would work too well. It just kept making it worse! For A MONTH. ON MY FACE. Thanks!

Lillian and Addie have been super fun…Addie has been going through a phase where she thinks she’s an adult. I think we’ve nipped that in the rear by now. She says funny things, ALL the time.
Like, “Mommy, are those spanking spoons and forks over there??” very loudly in a Wal-Mart aisle, pointing to a random set on an end cap. Hilarious, horrifying, straight up Arkansas-like. (And no, I could care less what anyone feels about that one)

Lillian is signing back to me! Simple, easy things, but this is the most fun stage and I loooove it. She knows “More”, “Milk”, “Cracker”, “Eat” (described with noise too), and "All Done". She recognizes many more, but those are the ones she does on her own with no assistance so far! She says “Thank You”, “Momma/Dada/Addie”, "Bye", "Hi", “Eggs”, and “NO”, which is by far her favorite.

Doug has recently found out good news, he might be graduating with an associates in science by the end of this year! If he can keep this up, this running dog tired and crazily thing til then. I’m so proud of him, I just keep hoping we will have an amazingly good 2011!!

To sum it up, its been a rocky start…but I’m so grateful for everything God has worked out for us, and we’re anxious to see what this year unfolds for The Erbs!!

-Kesolyn

"Wah-Ohh Wah-Ohh..."

I feel like I have missed out on SO much since the last post, seeing everyone's postings finally! Ugh, I guess if this house has to have one drawback...

I'd like to say that its been pretty uneventful here, but I think there are just so many things I've gotten used to so it just seems uneventful. Doug went on his first hunting trip to Colorado with the guys in the family...one of those rugged "grow out your hair everywhere" trips. He was gone a week, and wouldn't you know, the EXACT day he leaves, my phone starts messing up. Of course, without my electronics guru around things turn upside down!! No problem, I have a back-up bb on hand. Except, it doesn't even turn on. We run around for 3 hours finding a fix.Then the crankiness from the extremely busy week catches up on the girls, and all hell breaks loose. I'm emotional, things aren't going right, and I start crying. Wonderful. So later when I talk to him I say "My whole world just fell apart when you left!!" (just what every husband likes to hear, that they are needed and loved and valued, right?!)

Of course, things leading up to this point would explain: Addie's 4th birthday party. There's really nothing more stressful than trying to plan a kid's birthday party and hosting, one they "will never forget"...but of course do the second its over. I made a cake, it turned out pretty good. The marshmellow fondant wouldn't cooperate, and I had yet another meltdown from frustration. Who helps to save the day? Doug. How does a man know how to fix fondant? No idea. But he did, and I finally finished it a few hours before the party. All the silly stuff that never mattered in the first place faded, and my cheeseball and dip were a big hit!! It went smoothly, which is crazy. Then, two and a half hours later, it was over and it was just another night. One week's worth of stress for two and a half hours of fun. Dare I say it was worth it? Is that foolish? ha!!


Cake.

While Doug was gone, we took a trip to dad's to visit. We went horseback riding through the woods, Addie loved it! I went to Holiday Market event at the Fort Smith Convention Center, soooooo much fun. The girl's night section (of which I "acquired" a ticket to cause they were sold out, I got skilllls) was a blast. Holiday Market, for those that don't know, is an event where local businesses and shops can sell their items at booths just in time for Christmas. Free wine, good friends, fashion show, and shopping, that's an AWESOME night to a stay at home mom!!!!!! I was so thankful to be out and enjoying myself after a crazy few weeks, I reallllly needed that. Mojo's for a drink, for about half a second because the piano player was awful, then iHop. I won't even say what time I dragged my butt in, but it was probably the latest I've been out in a few years. I'm so thankful for the opportunity. I could never do it again and function right like the old days, another tell tale sign I'm too old for this. I'm kind of grateful though, I think we all know those that are still trying to kick that old ball around ;) Recognize, and embrace, right?

By the way, I found a super cute head wrap and made the other girls buy one too in different colors. While holding my new find, I saw some mittens with the fingertips cut out...so cute, so I flipped them over to see the palms, and spilled my wine all down the front of my shirt. RED wine. Ha!! Then we all wore the head wraps for a picture, of which I'm not allowed to post because apparently we all looked like cancer patients. hahah, thanks for the good times girls!

Shout out to my uncle, who makes some of the best burgers in his pressure cooker...

Thanksgiving was great, I mean, how could turkey and potatoes EVER be wrong?? My sister in law and mother in law are both catholic, and sometimes the priest joins us for holiday dinners. I think I've mentioned that before. This is the same one who graciously takes my joking, because I do this with everyone. I like to think he appreciates being treated like a normal person from time to time. He talks about how a black Thursday sale he found online for a peacock coat. I don't know why I couldn't. I knew I shouldn't. I did it anyways: "Black Thursday sale, is that like just a catholic thing? Why didn't I know about this!!" and then: "Peacock coat, what's that? Do you mean PEAcoat?! Ha." I think I have mixed emotions about this one. He laughed too. The catholic community now hates me. He is regarded as a very noble person in the catholic church. You do not do things like this. In my non-denominational world though, he is another person I will crack friendly jokes with. He actually jokes, maybe he gets me cause that's part of his personality too.

Upon Doug's return, and the night before Thanksgiving day, I noticed a rash on my face. What is it that flares up right before I have to see millions of people? Poison Ivy, but of course!!!! I have super sensitive skin, and in a matter of a few hours after noticing it walking out to the car from Gusano's, it is full blown itchy, red, and huge. 4 spots on my face. AWESSOOOOOOOMMMEE. Nowhere else. Just.The.Face. Sick. I hate stuff like this. The family on Thanksgiving had to endure the horrendous sight. The people on Black Friday early morning had to endure the horrendous sight (which actually worked to my advantage, nobody wants to fight with a looney with sores on her face!! HAHAHAH. The seas parted for me!!). The people who were at Shoguns, Cold Stone, and the movie theatre for our anniversary date night had to endure the horrendous sight. Thanks Cold Stone guy, for not even looking at me while talking and making it that much better. And finally, church-goers. I was so up and down, back and forth with my self-esteem. I now see just how big my pride is. Shame, lots of shame. I was convinced I could just embrace my problem and shrug it off, but seriously? My face? I keep thinking this is God's way of making me (literally) face one one of my problems, or bring attention to something I should be working on. A reminder? I think its from either horseback riding through the woods, or handling Doug's laundry after he's been all over the CO terrain. (They got one doe by the way!)

Ohhh, Addie can read!! She's been sounding out words on cards we have, I couldn't be more proud!! Also, Doug caught her singing the other day: "Wah-Ohh Wah-Ohh stuck like glue, you and me baby we're stuck like glue!" hahahahaha...I laughed and laughed. She also thanked God last night for "The dust on the bottle." Maaaaybe I've been listening to too much country lately. I didn't realize that till now, which is quite funny because I never really even used to like country. Its not the only thing I live on though :)

Lillian is finally standing and cruising, stubborn baby!! She's always done everything on her own time, but I'm honestly relieved. She'll even stand without holding on to the couch/coffee table, but then realize it and sit down. She's been bear crawling too, like its an alternative to crawling to give her knees a rest. Ha!!

I've had the best (and fastest) couple of months, and it will only get better!! I am so blessed, and have so much to be thankful for. With a little good humor, I can honestly say I feel my life is quite perfect. I've not been happier or more at peace with myself too. Woo!! We've got a toddler Christmas party, cookie swapping/gift wrapping party, white trash bash (I love costume parties!! I came back to edit out what I'm going as, it seems so inappropriate following the previous two ahaha), finals which also mean lots of family time afterwards, a baby shower, and of course Christmas coming up!!! Woo!

-Keslyn

A.W.E.S.O.M.E.

Alas, I've emerged from my blogger absence, once again. I feel like this takes so much more work than I intended...for instance, it took me a good 20 minutes to figure out why the tethering from my husband's phone to the computer wasn't working (his is the only one that can tether, so any usage from a real computer is only when he's at home and NOT on it, problem #1). Then another 5 minutes to make sure all hell doesn't break loose while I mess around on here, so snacks and drinks and everyone's gone potty and in good spirits. No cooperation from the kiddos=no fun. See how my life revolves around two little people, who together don't even amount to 50 lbs.?

The past month has been an adventure. There was always something...birthday parties, birthday parties, birthday parties. Lillian turned the big ONE!! I cannot explain how that week went about, or how I even survived it. I was sure to wait til the last 7 days to decide to plan a bigger party, duh! That makes life fun. It was a good spread, I stole a Dr. Seuss idea from someone who plans parties, but she did it for a baby shower. I just about peed my pants when I saw how wonderful it all was!!!!


This doesn't do the entire room justice, because there were Dr. Seuss books up on my windows and posters everywhere. Red and blue balloons. The cake alone took most of the afternoon and evening to make. It was fun, and I super enjoyed pushing my luck on trying new things.

The not so great part.
First 5 minutes of guests arriving, a little boy (who is apparently a second cousin of mine? I've never met him in my whole life, lest knew his existence either) bit Lillian on the mouth. Was he trying to give her kisses? I have absolutely NO idea. She's never been hurt before intentionally, and this hurt her feelings worse than anything I've ever seen. She'd be ok for a minute and someone would look at her and she burst out into tears again, shrieking and shaking. Awful, awful, awful. 30 minutes worth. How does mommy make it better? Well, by hurting her again in the same spot, of course!!!!!!!! Face your fears, right?!? (no, I'm not one of those moms, well I might be one day cause I just don't know, but this was NOT one of those intentional times. Put down the phone, stop dialing DHS. Please hear me out.) I was trying to re-arrange for a picture while holding her (wait wait, how awful does that sound? I hurt her while trying to pose nicely for a picture I'm in? Yes. And yes.) and leaned in too far, my brother raising his hand at the exact moment (the exact moment in time, of course. To the nano second.) and scraped her gums by accident where the bottom jaw caught in the bite. Awesome. More crying. More flaining. Short cake intro, followed by bed time, no opening of the presents. Yep, that's pretty much how it went down. Stresssssssss like you wouldn't believe. I felt horrible. Wretched. Relieved it was over. Glad she would sleep it off. It just brought back all the fear when she knocked her tooth in on an Applebee's table while teethi...nevermind. This is all you need to hear for right this minute on how much of a great mom I am!! :D

Doug has been here and there, and my schedule gone awry trying to adjust to include him when we can. That's, hard. And if you know me, you know a schedule and my expectations go hand in hand. Then there was my slum week where nothing was right. "Baaaahahahahaha, idiot, pretending things will be in perfect order!!!" That's what God booms to me. Followed by "Why don't you just let the professional handle this. Just shut up and sit down.".....................

I've read a little here and there. Well, not a little. The last Twilight book? Yeah, finished that in 2 days. Seven-hundred-and-fifty pages. That's right, my kids fended for themselves...put themselves to bed, ate whatever they could find out of the pantry with what little pre-Lucy-Like knowledge they have of opening anything, sprayed themselves with freshener so nobody would suspect they didn't bathe, and of course entertained each other. They're such dear little things. Mommy thanks you.

I'm reading Eat Pray Love (slowly, I lost motivation for a while) and its the BEST book so far. She is HILARIOUS. I feel I can relate to her humor. Sarcastic, slightly exaggerative. I'm afraid to watch the movie now, anything I've seen has sucked in al cinema--that's right, al cinema. Italian. Check yourself. That's whats up.

I've had lots of little faux pas here and there, nothing quite so drastic this time. I've also witnessed my little ray of sunshine leaving me a present in an unfilled tub. That was awesome, and makes 2/2 in keeping with a clearly new tradition. Ever had to fish one out of a tub? SO gross. And if you haven't yet, and you have little ones, I laugh evily the day it happens to you. Because it will. And then you'll have a disgusting story to share inappropriately with people at your church. Yep. Evily.

I started a pretty cool devotional (not to get all "I love Jesus" on everyone, it just reminds me). I bought the book. Then was told it was wrong, they meant the bible study version. So I took it back to Lifeway (those people are horrid, just so you know. Expect snobbiness and big noses that they look down on you with) and exchanged it. Then the person I'm doing it with brought me the book that was lastly the correct one, a devotional. No big deal, I'll just take it back, again. I took it back to promenade area, for the third time that week (well ok, one was for shopping with unexpected cash Doug surprised me with. He's awesome. I kind of like him more, now.) and put the book on the counter, recepit in it. The clerk takes the receipt, looks it over for about 30 seconds while I'm standing there with both girls, then sheepishly gives it back letting me know it wasn't the correct store receipt. It was from TJ Maxx, where I'd been the day before. Among the other contents listed, were two "LINGERIE" descriptions.

A.W.E.S.O.M.E.

I felt it starting in my feet, they turned into giant sandbags, failing to do an about face and run. Then I'm pretty sure I flushed slowly everywhere, much like an allergic reaction, spreading from where the heart pumps the hardest into the places with the biggest arteries, then slowly outward. Very much like the epic tale of red-tinted indians. Live, right there in Rogers, Arkansas, returning a bible study book with a lingerie receipt. Just to clarify, they weren't slinky lingerie. Staples, only. But it doesn't matter, the label still covered it all, including my pride. Then I got to stand there for 20 minutes while they figured out what to do next!!!!

I'm excited about a fall/halloween party we're going to. We're going to carve pumpkins and dress up. Here's the big reveal on what we're going to be this year: Addie is Lady Bug Girl, from Lady Bug Girl books. Lillian is a hysterical pirate that cries at any given notice. I'm the Sunmaid raisin girl (with even a grape basket! There will be a box of sunmaid raisins of course, so it makes it a little more obvious. First I have to buy a real box of Sunmaid raisins, mine just say Great Value for some reason). And Doug will be the man who has tons of homework and can't participate :/

Computer wants to die, guess that's all for now. Ciao, til next month?!
-Kesolyn